This was something Solomon made sure to instruct his son about in Proverbs 1:8-19, and it follows that we, with some thoughtful examination, can also gain some insight into the method sinners employ to draw you down a road that, in the long run, you really don't want to be on.Hear, my son, your father’s instruction
And do not forsake your mother’s teaching;
Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head
And ornaments about your neck.
My son, if sinners entice you,
Do not consent.
If they say, “Come with us,
Let us lie in wait for blood,
Let us ambush the innocent without cause;
Let us swallow them alive like Sheol,
Even whole, as those who go down to the pit;
We will find all kinds of precious wealth,
We will fill our houses with spoil;
Throw in your lot with us,
We shall all have one purse,”
My son, do not walk in the way with them.
Keep your feet from their path,
For their feet run to evil
And they hasten to shed blood.
Indeed, it is useless to spread the baited net
In the sight of any bird;
But they lie in wait for their own blood;
They ambush their own lives.
So are the ways of everyone who gains by violence;
It takes away the life of its possessors.
For the sake of organized thought, we are going to break this rather large portion of Scripture down into three basic parts: 1) The parents' instruction (vs.9-8) 2) The sinners invitation (vs.10-14) and 3) The Father's exhortation (vs. 15-19). We will examine a few points in this post, and discuss the remaining considerations in another post in coming days.
The parent's instruction
Hear, my son, your father’s instruction
And do not forsake your mother’s teaching;
Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head
And ornaments about your neck.
There is a particular nuance of this address that I want to draw out for us, and it is this: these instructions would present a challenge to the son. It goes like this: by default, if you are going to be instructed, it implies that you need it one way or another. If you are going to be taught, it means you still need to learn. So, to grasp to his parents' instruction and teaching, the son would also have to grasp the fact that he actually needed them, or at least be willing to embrace them til he sees his need. So then, integrated with the reception of instruction is the reception of personal incompetence. As we all should know from experience, this reality is an affront to pride and is very offensive to self sufficiency. It's not appealing to your self-esteem to have to listen to someone else teach you, but that is exactly what the son needed to do: embrace the offensive and submit to the reality that his current sate of heart/mind wasn't good enough, and he still needed to be taught.
However, although Solomon's instructions may have included some level of difficulty, they were not actually harmful to the the son. It would be wrong to assume that such submission to his parents teaching (and recognition of his own need) was all pain, since it would present such challenge. On the contrary, his parents' words were actually of personal benefit to the son. Solomon likens them to jewelry: "Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head and ornaments about your neck." Note that the instructions themselves were what decorated the son, so they themselves were to be valued.
So we see, then, that his parents' words, although offensive to pride, actually beautified him. They decorated him and were of great value to him, and to reject them would be like rejecting such valuables as "a graceful wreath" or "ornaments". There was value in the teaching in and of itself. Without them he was just...normal.
The sinner's invitation
“Come with us..."
Turning from his instruction that the son hear his instruction, Solomon proceeds to warn his son of something which he is not to do. He now launches into a description of a hypothetical situation, which he introduces by saying "If sinners entice you...".
First off, it is worth noting that the word "sinners" is plural1. Here are multiple people all saying the same thing to the son. Already, then, he is outnumbered, and has become the minority in this situation. On top of that pressure, the sinners bring to him an intentionally persuading request - they entice him. You see, Solomon doesn't warn his son that he might be tied and gagged and hauled off to commit crime by force, but that he might be persuaded with words. The sinners' want their presentation to be accessorized with a tempting desirability. The son, now, is being pressured into consenting both by the fact that he is outnumbered, and that the invitation is presented as an appealing one.
Already we see a difference between the parents' instruction and the sinners' invitation: the former is potentially undesirable because of the offense involved and the humility required. However, the second is presented as a rather desirable choice and doesn't offend the son's self-esteem, but actually flatters it. If the decision was made simply off of what sounded more appealing, what was presented as more palatable, or what just 'felt better' to him, walking in his parents' instructions probably wouldn't be the son's first choice.
Now that we are introduced to this hypothetical situation, in which the son is outnumbered one way or another by people who are going to somehow appeal to him, our next reasonable question may be "what might they say? What is the content of their enticement? ".
“...Come with us,
Let us lie in wait for blood,
Let us ambush the innocent without cause;
Let us swallow them alive like Sheol,
Even whole, as those who go down to the pit;
We will find all kinds of precious wealth,
We will fill our houses with spoil;
Throw in your lot with us,
We shall all have one purse,”
We must start by paying careful attention to the first three words out of the sinners' mouths: "come with us...". (Admittedly, we aren't going to get farther than that today). In these words we find an inclusive, indiscriminate, excepting, and open invitation of association. We don't see them set any rules or conditions by which the son may include himself with them, but they openly invite him to join their group with no need for change on his part. This is also seen by the use of the word "us" throughout the discourse. They are all going to lie in wait for blood, they are all going to ambush and swallow the innocent, they are all going to reap the benefits of that, and so forth. They capitalize on inclusion void of discrimination. We see, then, that this is where they want him to be - with them.
As we wind this post down (we'll look at the rest of the scripture quoted above next time), it is worth stopping again to take note of a clear contrast between the words of these sinners, and those of the parents back in verses 8-9. We've already observed that the parents presented instruction, while the sinners presented enticement, but now we see a bit of why sinners' invitation would be so enticing. Unlike the parents, the sinners don't say anything about the son needing to learn or be instructed or else compromise his self esteem. Instead, they are willing to receive him just as he is. They don't judge him, he doesn't need to change anything. Once with them, of course, he'll need to do what they do and donate to their cause, but that's ok because these folks actually appreciate him and lovingly accept him just the way he is. This nuance makes the invitation come off particularly appealing, and thus marks a clear contrast between the parents' instruction and the sinners' invitation. It is void of any kind of conviction or demand for humility on the son's part. It doesn't require him to recognize his own inability and need to be taught. Instead, the sinners seem to target the son's acceptance of himself by means of their acceptance of him. If the son was convinced that he really was ok and was determined to stay that way, then he would opt to listen to the sinners and not his parents. This is no doubt part of why Solomon called the invitation an "enticement".
This will do for our first post. Next time we will look at a few more things and finish this section off. What can we learn from what we have considered so far? Well, if you are in the habit of shunning instruction because it offends you, just know that you are prime target for sinners. Simply because something is hard or offensive doesn't make it bad. If you think people who are nice enough to accept you and never judge you really are genuine friends, realize that you are vulnerable to falling prey to the friendliness of sinners such as Solomon has described. Don't be duped into thinking you should embrace a relationship with someone just because they do so to you; the fact that someone seems to appreciate you simply isn't enough to win your trust. Be discerning!
"The naive believes everything,
But the sensible man considers his steps."
~ Proverbs 14:15
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1Perhaps the plurality of the word "sinners" could refer to either a group of sinners, or maybe multiple occasions of enticement from different sinners. In either case, Solomon's instructions still apply and the son has the pressure of association from more than one person, whether at once or in multiple different times. With that said, I would take this to lean towards a group of sinners, primarily because they go on to say in verse 14 "we shall all have one purse" not "we shall both have one purse". I am open to further observations, so please feel free to contribute.
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